Desire for All That is Lost
by Kirux
Summary: After Roxas saw Namine on Destiny Islands, he's been wanting to see her again. The only problem in his way is the whole not existing thing. But he decides that he will overcome anything to be with the one he loves. Roxas x Namine! Spoliers! Complete!
1. Missing You

Okay, yes another story by me already. It's not yaoi or shounen ai, but it is a sweet love story about Namine and Roxas. I know some people may not like this pairing, but I simply adore it. Sure Axel x Roxas or Seifer x Roxas is cuter, but I was replaying KHII and in the beginning I always cry because they don't really ever get to be with each other. So I decided to gove them thehappy ending they deserve, like I gave to Riku and Sora. This story is more fluff than anything else so please enjoy!  
Disclaimer: I still don't own the characters sadly enough. This time the music belongs to Kaoru Wada and Yoko Shimomura.  
-Kirux

* * *

- Desire for All That is Lost -  
- Chapter One: Missing You -

* * *

_In that brief second, when Kairi and Sora had held hands, I could feel you again. I knew you were there, smiling at me, and I smiled back. I wanted to reach out to you, and hold you, and talk to you about all the things you had promised we would. I just didn't know how._

_How do I separate myself from Sora? He needs me just as I need him. I wish there were some way for me to just release myself from him, yet still be the same. Maybe, maybe if I waited long enough, and wished hard enough, it would happen. Someday…somehow…I would reach you Namine…I promise.

* * *

_

I've been having these weird dreams lately, dreams that had to do with Pence, Olette, and Hayner, from Twighlight Town. I was there, but I wasn't me. Yet I wasn't someone completely different, and the person I was was so sad and angry all the time, but he still managed to have fun. I felt as though I had already done all the things from the dreams myself, and that is what was so odd. I knew I hadn't, yet I still knew exactly what was happening in the dreams. Sometimes they wouldn't be dreams at all; they would be flashbacks. I'm not sure that is the right word for it, but it will have to do for now.

Also, I've been having this strange attraction to Kairi, and that was really hard to explain to Riku. He got pissy whenever I told him I was going to go hang out with her. He had always been the jealous type, but that's part of the reason why I love him. But anyways, my attraction towards Kairi, I didn't understand it at all. She had never really liked me in that way either, but she seemed to be acting differently towards me lately. Real lovey dovey like, and it kind of creeped me out. In fact I was planning on hanging out with her today anyways…

* * *

_Maybe, maybe if I make my emotions for her so strong, and I concentrate on them, they will be so different from Sora's that they'd have to separate from him…_

_I know, that's completely a stupid idea. I also know that I has chosen to return to him, but I couldn't stand it anymore. I was so alone. I didn't have any of the people I had loved with me anymore. It also doesn't help that none of them knew who I was. Pence, Olette, Hayner, Seifer, Axel…_

_If I had been able too, I would have cried thinking about that. Imagine having to watch your best friend die, right in front you, sacrificing himself to save you even though it wasn't really you, and not being able to call out to him. To touch him, to even let him know you still thought of him, or to finally thank him for all his help…

* * *

_

"Sora, why are you crying?" Kairi looked at me worriedly as we sat there on the beach.

"I'm not entirely sure, just all of a sudden, I felt so sad and lost. I got this sudden twinge in my heart, like I had lost a very close friend," I tried to wipe away the tears and stop crying but I couldn't, "it's like it has all been building up for so long."

She hugged me close and I felt awful. I didn't like her hugging me; in fact I almost pushed her away. I just couldn't help it though. It felt right to be crying on her shoulder, like she understood perfectly what I had been going through. That was another problem, what had I been going through?

* * *

_I could feel her again, and she was really close this time. Oh what I would give to touch her, or even to see her, maybe even hear her voice!_

_All of this was driving my absolutely crazy. I was stuck here, locked away in the dark. All I could see were glimpses of memories, some of them weren't even real. DiZ had just programmed some of them into my mind, like all the ones from the usual spot. I envied Sora for that, too, being able to have met the feel gang, not just computer generated replicas. I want real friends. I want real memories._

_Most of all however, I want to know the real you…

* * *

_

"Sora, it's going to be okay. I don't know why we are both going through this, and I know it's really awkward for both of us. Lately, I've only wanted to be with you. I can't explain it, so I'm not even going to try. It's like there's another person deep inside me trying to get out," She hugged me closer and she too started to cry, "A person trying to get out a be with somebody they really care for."

* * *

_Than I heard her…_

"_Roxas, don't be so sad. I'm always with you, no matter how far apart we are. And someday, I know we will be able to see each other. It may not be as soon as we both would like, but we still have too keep waiting patiently. That's all we really can do."

* * *

_

"Kairi…" I blinked and my tears started to stop. I felt funny, like I was fading from existence…

* * *

"_Namine…" I blinked and suddenly tears began to fall from my eyes. I felt strange, like I actually existed…

* * *

_

Okay, so, the first chapter! I like how it turned out. I typed this really late, and on a whim, so if it's hard to follow I'm really sorry. Please enjoy and review! Loves and such!  
- Kirux


	2. Floating in Bliss

Okay so chapter two of Desire for All That is Lost…hereby simply refereed to as Desire. I haven't gotten much feed back on the first chapter, but I want to finish the story anyways. So on with the show I suppose.  
-Kirux

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- Desire for All That is Lost -

- Chapter Two: Floating in Bliss -

I smelled the ocean air and head the gulls cry as they glided through the air. I opened my eyes and saw her standing there in front of me, as radiant and beautiful as I remembered. 

"Namine!" I embraced her so tight. So tight that I swore no one could have torn us apart at that moment. I had waited so long to see her. I had no way to keep track of time, so it could have been years, or maybe just a couple of days.

"Roxas! It's so good to see you!" She nuzzled into my shoulder and I felt her starting to cry, "How long do we have?"

"I'm not sure…"

* * *

"_Where am I?" I asked out loud to the darkness. I felt lost in myself. I felt so cold and alone all of a sudden. Than it hit me._

_All this time, it must have been Roxas. This is where he was now, always deep in the darkness of nonexistence. It must be so lonely down here all by himself; no friends, no family, no one to love. Some how he must have found a way to switch places with me, but would he want to do that? Who could he possibly want to see?

* * *

_

"Let's go do something, Namine!" I stood up and pulled her up with me. I looked around, it was truly a beautiful beach, but this isn't where I wanted to be.

"What should we do?" She held on to my hand tight and also looked around.

"Let's go home!" I knew that the door was here somewhere. I started walking up the beach and searching every nook from where I was.

"Home? Isn't this technically our home?" She looked at me with a worried glance.

"THIS WILL NEVER BE MY HOME!" I shouted at her. She looked startled and I felt a twinge of guilt, "I didn't mean to yell at you Namine, I'm sorry," I brought her close and kissed her softly. I guess she hadn't been expecting it, because she froze up for a quick second before gently kissing back.

"Hey you two! Have you seen Sora and Kairi?" I heard a familiar voice and looked up. There stood Riku, "YOU! What are you doing here? What have you done to Sora?" He stood there in a fighting stance, his very posture demanded answers.

I held Namine's hand tighter, "I haven't done anything with him or to him, honestly. I just wanted to see Namine. I wanted it so bad, and the next thing I knew I was out here."

* * *

_That's it, he liked that girl Namine, Kairi's Nobody. Suddenly I got it. That's why I had been wanting to see Kairi so much lately. He must have missed her a lot. I understood where he was coming from, being locked away, not being able to be with the one you love, yet knowing they are so very near. It must be pure hell for him, and poor Namine. Maybe that's what was happening! They were on the outside right now, being with each other, like they wanted. Their feelings must have been so strong to force Kairi and I inside, and let them be on the outside._

_I was okay with it though, because even Nobody's need love. Than again technically they weren't Nobodies anymore, they were whole, the just hadn't separated themselves yet. Now what would be so powerful as to change someone's destiny? Well maybe not change it, but strengthen it?

* * *

_

"Okay, I understand now," said Riku with a grim look on his face. I had explained to him how much I had wanted to see Namine, because we had promised to see each other again.

"Thank you, we'll go back as soon as we are finished talking about everything," said Namine. I had forgotten how sweet and intelligent her voice sounded. I didn't want to ever forget again.

"No, I don't want to just fade away again. Especially after having spent so much time with you! That would be ten times worse than having none of this happen!" I started to cry again.

"We can't just lock them away forever, Roxas," she frowned at me.

"But…but I still haven't done everything I've wanted too. I haven't seen Pence, Olette, or Hayner. I haven't gone to the tunnel of darkness…I haven't said goodbye to Axel…" I cried even harder. I felt so good to finally be able to cry my own tears.

"Hmmm, this just proves that neither of you are Nobodies," Riku turned his back to us. He seemed to be staring at a small island just off the shore, "Maybe…if we can make fate strong enough, you and Namine can be together, and I could have Sora back."

* * *

"_Think Sora think, what can change destiny?" I thought as hard as I could_ , _"That's it! The papou fruit!"

* * *

_

"Roxas, Namine, follow me. I want you to have a papou…"

* * *

Yay! A solution is at hand! What will happen after they eat it though? Oh who knows? Wait, I do, and I'll tell you guys in the next chapter! Stay tuned!  
-Kirux 


	3. Hand in Hand

Okay, I might as well get this thing running again. Didn't get rave reveiws, but it seems like I've been neglecting this story like an unwanted red headed stepchild. Well, I might as well let it out of the closet for a half an hour so CYS doesn't end upon my door step. Right, on with the story!  
-Kirux

* * *

- Desire For All That is Lost -  
- Chapter Three: Hand in Hand -

* * *

"What's a papou fruit?" I hadn't let go of Namine's hand yet, and I'm not sure I ever would.

"It's a very special fruit that is said to have the power to tie two people's destinies no matter what," Riku said while leading us up the stairs of some broken down hut. We emerged facing a bridge, on the other side a small islet with a tree on it. It must have been the papou tree.

"What are we suppose to do with it?" Namine asked him as we approached the fruit tree.

"C'mon, Namine, I always got the impression you were smarter than that!" Riku picked one of the small star shaped fruits off the branch and broke it in half, handing both Namine and I a piece, "You're suppose to eat it!"

He smiled, which was odd, he didn't seem the kind to smile very often,but I took the fruit from his hand, as did Namine, "Well, we might as well…"

I bit into the fruit. It was different tasting. It wasn't bad, but I wouldn't make a habit out of eating them. It tasted like someone took a mango and gave it the aftertast of grapefruit, than made it look pretty.

"Roxas, I feel kinda, funny…" Namine dropped her piece of fruit and started to sway.

"Namine, hold on, I've go---" Suddeny I lost all control of my body, my mind was going completely blank. I dropped onto the sand and was enveloped in darkness once more.

* * *

"_Ow ow ow ow ow!" What in the world could he possibley be doing to make it hurt like this? It felt as though my entire body was ripping apart! Roxas, you ass, if you do anything rash…_

_Than again if he did it would technically be my fault because he was me. So would I have to say 'Sora, you ass, if you do anything rash!"_

"_Stop talking about me that way!"_

"_What? Who are you? Where are you?" I looked around bewildered and suddenly a light appeared and out of it walked Roxas._

"_I told you to stop talking about me as if I were you! I'm not like you in anyway! I have my own feelings! I have my own dreams! I'm tired of being locked inside of you! I'm tired of being forced to be you! That's why I ate that papou like Riku told me to. Maybe now I can finally be free to be myself!"_

"_You actually ate a papou? So my idea was right! Huzzah! But wait, if you did, why are we both stuck here in the darkness?"_

"_Because you're too dense to figure out how to leave it," he walked over to me and grabbed my arm, "You're suppose to walk to the light, not sit there and gawk at it"_

_With that he started to pull me into the light. I had to squint my eyes practically closed in order to really se anything, but even then, it was too bright to make anything out. I did see, however; the out line of Roxas and Namine. They were holding hands, walking off in a different direction. I hadn't notice him leaving my side, but I suddenly felt lighter. Like I was free to be me again.

* * *

_

"—ra? –ora!" I heard a voice. I kenw that voice. Now who did it belong to? "SORA YOU PANSY GET OFF OF ME!"

"GYAH! Riku?" I opened my eyes and loooked around, "Riku, where are you?"

"You're sitting on me dumb ass!" He pushed on my back and I tumbled over.

"Riku!" I jumped up and rushed to him. I grabbed his hand and pulled him up off the ground.

"Hey Sora, it's good to see you again," He smiled at me and pulled me close to him, gentely kissing my forehead.

"It's good to see you, too," I looked around and saw Kairi laying over on the ground next to us and kinda shuddered, "Where are Roxas and Namine?"

"I truly don't know…"

* * *

"Hey, you must be the new kid around here!" 

"Yeah, so what if I am?"

"Well, there only one rule here. Whatever I say goes, and if you have a problem with that, you can take it up with the rest of the disiplinary committee."

"Yeah, Seifer's always right, y'know!"

"AFFIRMATIVE!"

I couldn't help but smile as I stood in front of Seifer, Raijin, and Fuijin, aka; Twighlight Town's Displinary Committee.

"What are you smiling at, punk?" Seifer pointed his struggle bat at my face and scowled.

"Hey, Seifer, leave him alone!" said Hayner jumping out of nowhere, holding his own struggle bat.

"Yeah you big bully!" shouted Ollette, running up behind Hayner, with Pence lagging behind, camera dangling around his neck.

"Eh, whatever," Seifer said resting his bat on his shoulder and walking away, "You guys so aren't worth my time."

"Yeah, Seifer's got better things to do than waste his time on wealkings like you, y'know," raijin turned around and ran after him.

"PEONS," Fuijin said before turning around and following her fellow committee members.

"Heh, cowards!" Hayner yelled standing up right and letting his bat fall to the ground of the sandlot. He turned to me and smiled, "Heya, sorry if they bothered you. We're not all like that."

"It's okay, Hay—" Whoops, almost forgot, they don't really know me! Oh great think of something, " um…Hey would you guys like to get some sea salt icecream with my and my girlfriend?"

They looked at me funny before looking at each other and shrugging it off.

"Okay, why not? I'm Hayner, that's Olette, and that's Pence," he said pointing out everybody.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Roxas," I saw Namine running down the hill waving at me while holding a box of popscicles in her other hand, "and that's Namine."

I waved back and sighed. I was finally home. I finally had my own friends. Most importantly, I finally have you, my dear Namine.

* * *

Okay, end. Finito, it wasn't as hard to write as I though it would be. A nice little ending I must say so myself. It's kinda short I know, but the story itself already was longer than I though it would be. I dunno, I just don't feel as though it's completely finished yet. Look out for a sequal maybe. Not promising anything, or maybe just a little prologue. Thanks for reading! Love you guys!  
-Kirux 


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